Letting Go

River Rain has been taking more control of her bedroom. She has recently insisted that she wants to tend to her dresser drawers herself. And since I often ask her to put away her own laundry, and since she always chooses her clothes herself these days, that makes sense.

However, she wants to keep her drawers like this:

I probably don’t have to tell you that this does not fit my ideal of what a dresser drawer would look like. But if she’s doing the work, and if she’s choosing the clothes, why do I care? We have been practicing folding clothes Marie Kondo style, so she is learning, but if she wants to shove them in her drawer and save me a bunch of work, why should I strive for an ideal that is taking away valuable novel reading time? Ultimately what I want is to teach my kids to be self reliant and to care for their own selves and belongings. I think that caring for her own dresser, at 6, is going to teach her more than being forced to perfectly fold all of her clothing. I think…  Also, another big plus of me going with this idea is that I no longer need to fold her clothes every time I wash them. Does it sound like I feel relaxed about this transition? Because I don’t. But I DO want more time to myself. So I take a deep breath and – move on.


Toooo… River cleaning her own room. I have been griping for a month about all the little toys on her floor. Every time I am putting her to bed I am fearful of stepping on teeny footnhurting pieces of plastic. Her carpet has been un-vacuumable because there were so many tiny treasures littering it. I kept wondering if I should just bite the bullet and clean it for her; after all, she is only six. But I do SO MUCH housework every day. I am a dish washing, clothes folding, floor sweeping, animal feeding machine. Plus I work and volunteer at least as much as I work. If one person in our home can do something that takes part of the burden off me, you bet I’m for it. So I have been strong on this idea that she is responsible for her own belongings. And it has slowly been taking root. Yesterday at the store she wanted a toy with many small pieces and I reminded her about the state of her room and told her she would not be getting any toys for quite some time until I saw a change in the way she cared for her room. We made a deal then and there that if she could clean up her room, and clear the floor of junk and find a home for everything (or choose toys to give away) by the end of the weekend, that I would buy her that toy. Well, two afternoons after school she worked on her room, and here is the result as of all her hard work. I would say we are 99% of the way there, and I did none of the work. But I will gladly come in and vacuum now.


About Erin O'Neill

Hi, my name is Erin O'Neill. I am a part time urban homesteader and a full time homemaker and new mom. I enjoy canning my own food, crafting, raising chickens and working my bit of land. This blog is for anyone who wants to hear about the day to day struggles and successes of incorporating the old ways of life back into today's busy world.
This entry was posted in compromise, Family, home, kids, organizing, parenting, struggles. Bookmark the permalink.

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